Objective Reasons Why Country Music Sucks (pt. 2)

Ah, another Tuesday. Another day jam packed with music’s distant cousin, country. It always has me thinking; I just don’t get this stuff. And if you’ve followed me for a while, you’ll know this. For it’s a well-known fact that I abhor country music. I’ve mentioned it several times and even once wrote just about objective reasons why country music sucks (this is the sequel).

The response to that blog is interesting. It’s an anomaly of sorts. I’ve had friends tell me they liked it and agree, but that’s not out of the norm. The part that’s out of the norm is that out of roughly 7000 views on over 100 blog posts, as of today, it has over a thousand views. Over the past several months, it has consistently gotten well over a hundred views a month.

And I know those aren’t big numbers. I do this for fun. I enjoy writing and if others enjoy reading my writing, then great! But, I mean, I’ll only publish a few things a month; I just don’t have the time. There’s plenty to write about, but there are rocks to climb and snow-capped mountains and, well, writing just doesn’t motivate me the same way.

But out of only a handful of posts and a few thousand views, here’s what’s interesting:












This is a screenshot of some of the search criteria that has led people to view my blog. Again, the numbers are small, but statistically, they are significant. There’s an overwhelming response has come from others who have a similar distaste for the genre. It’s unfortunate, on one hand, that they’re not all searches for me; I guess I’m just not that popular! But a disdain for country music? That seems to get the fish biting!

So I thought I’d come up with some other rather objective reasons as to why country music sucks. As much as I’d love more views and higher viewership, mainly I just need to get this frustration out ..and I am really interested in seeing the metrics of this particular post compared to non-country bashing posts.

We’ll pick up from where the last blog left off:


4. Emotionless. Isn’t music about expression? That gives music dimension; it brings depth. If you’re trying to tell a story, tell it like you have a vested interest in it. If you’re angry, show it; if you’re upset, sound like you care; if you’re in love, sound like it. I’m listening to this stuff right now and, unless I focus on the words, the music, song to song, is all the same. I can’t derive any meaning from the inflection. There is no soul. These are just notes. And twangy notes at that; the worst kind.

Alternatives? Something folksy (isn’t that where country has its roots?), like Iron and Wine, where there’s dialogue and inflection and so much more organic emotion. Plus, Sam Beam's story telling is pretty great. Something folksy/rocky/experimental-ly like mewithoutYou, where there is real story-telling and the music is driven by emotion wrapped in metaphor. Or, for something completely different, Listener, for more of an emotive spoken word. You can feel the music with these. They don’t sound like some bloviating Texan corporate monolith. Feel!

5. It keeps trying to be mainstream Rock or Pop. Why?! At this point, it’s hard to tell that the genre is rooted in folk rather than rock or pop, based on much of what is mainstream. That leads to more emphasis on the hook, more emphasis on song structure, and more repetition. It’s a pretty universal idea that those formulas are what sell; that’s what’s done it for rock, pop, and everything else that has made it into the public conscience. Country is just exploiting these songwriting elements and making them more formulaic than they ever have been.

Alternatives? Real rock and real pop.

6. It pushes no boundaries. Music used to be about pushing boundaries; that’s what made it exciting. The stuff they play every Tuesday here at work is positively dull. There are different tempos and different keys, but nothing that makes you go Wow. The only thing new in country is that it can no longer survive as its own genre. Music isn’t about hiding behind the guise of another.

Alternatives? Bela Fleck and the Flecktones. Not a personal favorite, but everything I’ve heard of theirs has been pushing boundaries. There’s innovation, texture, and depth. Plus, they’ve got a banjo; that should appeal to the country folk…



And I’ll stop with those three. Perhaps I’ll continue with more at another time. Again, these are generalizations, but I am trying desperately to be unbiased and objective.

Any other thoughts? I’d love to hear other arguments against …or even for country. It would be interesting to know what it is that doesn’t drive others away.